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Sunday, September 12, 2004
BACKGROUND: "What We Saw" CBS documentary on 9-11
Natasha has been working two jobs and I've been doing my work running the kids department. But one of her jobs has !finally! stepped up her schedule, so she has something like 15 straight days of work. So we haven't been seeing too much of us. And I've been going through some serious stress lately. So, yes, sure, we still both love and care for each other and we were still meant to be together. It's just been a bit difficult lately.
So I just got off work. I was closing tonight. Horrible night. Lots of running around and idiots on the phone and a lot of dumb, ignorant rednecks being assholes. Lots of craziness. And my mind was seriously elsewhere all night. So, what was GOING to happen was that I was going to come home, cuddle with my baby, and fall asleep, the two of us holding each other. But this guy at work is turning 40 and Tasha is really close with him because they're both cool and both into the same sort of stuff
So she decided to go to his birthday party tonight. She told me that she'd only be there for a little bit and that she's be home when I got off work but right before I got off work she called and asked me if I wanted to meet her there. I could have gone but I've been working all night, I'm tired, I'm sore, my stomache hurts, my feet are on fire. Last thing I want to do in this tired, exhausted state is to hang out with Amanda and Sema, no offense meant to either of them.
Now I'm vaguely upset. I've been vaguely upset a lot lately. I've been here for over a half hour and no Tasha at all. That's sad. That's really sad. I'm feeling sad and lonely and all sorts of sniffling over here.
So if you're going to do something, you might as well go all the way with it. You only live once and only for so long, right? So right now I'm watching a documentary on the events of September 11th, 2001 and it's depressing the high holy fuck outta me. I bought it at work for exactly $3.78 and I did so because, like I just said, I figured that if I was going to be sad then I might as well go the full nine and not pussy out about it, you know? You might as well go all the way with whatever you do, including sadness, so I here I am in a lonely house drinking bad mexican beer and watching a 9-11 documentary. Here I am going all the way with my sadness. And why the fuck not, right? Hell, it was either watch this or watch Schindler's List.
Which would still make a kick ass musical, Tom!
Tuesday, September 7, 2004
BACKGROUND: Spongebob Squarepants
The all new 7th anniversary Halloween issue of Canada's Rue Morgue magazine, which came out TODAY in
local Barnes and Noble bookstores in Sacramento and therefore I'm assuming should also be available wherever you are, has a two page article about The Church of Ed Wood and me, Reverend Steve. There's a few pictures, including one of me, and there's a bar featuring my own personal top five Ed Wood films. Can you believe that? Me, a skinny, nerdy little mexican guy drinking coffee and watching Spongebob, has a two page article in Rue Morgue magazine.
The thing is, I haven't read it yet. I am here at home with the baby watching movies
and cartoon and eating popcorn and drinking soda. Actually, I knew that it was coming out today for weeks and for weeks I've been going crazy, but once I woke up this morning I TOTALLY FORGOT about it. I was watching Spongebob, washing dishes, making food, doing normal things while being completely oblivious to what was going to happen today. I put the baby to bed for a nap (and ended up accidentally having an hour and a half nap myself). I watched a bit of Goodfellas, the greatest movie ever made next to Plan 9 from Outer Space. And then, out of nowhere, Tasha calls to tell me that she had the magazine in her hand.
That was four hours ago. Now I feel like I'm about to have a heart attack with antici ... say it ... pation. For a while there I was having a fit like my two year old daughter has, stomping my feet and saying "I WANNA READ IT!"
See, I would totally be up for driving myself and the baby to my work and pick up my own copy of the magazine but Tasha has the baby seat, not me, so I'm basically trapped here at home until she comes home with the article. It's driving me crazy. I'm chewing my fingernails off here. I hear that it's really good stuff A-A-A-AND, in the kinda weird department, right after my article it has an article about local Sacramento punk band and my FAVORITE band ever, the Groovie Ghoulies, which is weird since we both have articles in Canada's leading movie magazine.
So basically all I can do now is wait with baited breath.
So the California State Fair ended yesterday and Tasha, Em, and me went. Marisa was going to come but she was sleeping or having a headache or in some wacky drama, one of those or maybe all of the above (love you, 'risa). But the all new Galindo family versiom 1.0 had a great time, thanks in part to my father buying us all season passes, which rocked. We went something like six or seven times. Here are a few pictures that I took of us ...
That is my beautiful daughter Emerald with a goat. The petting zoo was cool and Emerald went around hugging all the animals and kissing them on the forehead. This really scared me when she walked up the the badass looking llama behind her wanting to hug and kiss it but thankfully she skipped that animal.
Here is the ALL NEW GALINDO FAMILY version 1.0 on the world's largest moveable ferris wheel in the northern hemisphere. That thing was huge and it was a major test of my fear of heights but thankfully it wasn't that bad with Emerald and Natasha there with me. Natasha is pointing at the camera so that Emerald would pose for the picture but it soon became a point of someone afraid that a very expensive digital camera would fall off the world's largest moveable ferris wheel in the northern hemisphere.
So Nikara gave us all these tickets and Emerald was riding rides instead of what Natasha and I USUALLY do, which is sit at that one damn bench in front of the water game for a few hours, then go to the mexican section and drink some beers and then look at county exhibits until it's time to go. So Emerald wanted to go on this kiddie swing think that went really fast and Natasha got in line to go with her. Well, once she got to the front of the line the (pick any two of the following descriptions) dirty/crack-addict/retarded/deaf/crippled/ignorant/foriegn/white trash/black/stinky carnie told us that she had to ride alone. Emerald is only two and a half and she had never rode on a ride alone, but they waited in this big ass line for forever and Emerald really wanted to go so that was her first ever ride alone. Tasha and I were completely freaked out but Emerald had a great time. She's laughing and smiling and waving hello while her mommy and daddy are near tears watching her grow up right in front of our eyes.
This one is Natasha and Emerald in line for the bumblebees. The bumblebees. Those damn bumblebees. The ones that Emerald !HAS! to ride every time we go to the fair. Those damn bumblebees. The line was something like nine million hours long and almost half of the bumblebees didn't work but it was all worth it to make her happy. Check out the fat white trash chick behind Natasha who had kids who wanted Tasha to pick her up. What? Yeah, some strange little cracker girl wanting a complete and total stranger to pick her up. Weird.
And this is all of us on the merry-go-round at the end of the day. Fun. That damn thing goes FAST! And I was yelling out "MIKE!" even though there wasn't anyone I know there. I like doing that, yelling out names of people in crowds and waving as if I;m trying to get the attention of someone I know. It's fun. Near the end, Tasha and Emerald were yelling for Mike too.
Well, not only was that fun and educational and really cool but it also killed over 40 minutes of waiting-for-magazine time. Man, I think I should drink a few beers tonight. Hell, I might have to just to go to sleep. Maybe I should stop drinking coffee, huh? Maybe. Well, bye for now.
Sunday, September 5, 2004
BACKGROUND: Magnetic Fields "69 Love Longs vol. III"
I get so sad and angry down and depressed and self-loathing and lonely and shy and quiet and mad at work whenever I have to close. I stand next to my desk all alone in the cavernous children's depertment watching white families start to walk into my section, see me, then turn around to find a nice looking white person that can help them find what they need. So I stand there and write in my little red diary and find things to do. I just get so sad and lonely and that always leads me towards thinking about how stupid I am and all the mistakes I've ever made in the past and then that sends me down an even deeper road.
So I'm updating my blog because I don't want to take a shower because I don't want to get dressed because I don't want to go to work. Mornings are fine, nice, easy, productive, busy. But the night shifts just kill me. And they have me closing every sunday night now, which usually means that the only people I see in kids are white families after church who give me the UUGH face when they see a skinny long-haired mexican man in charge of the kids department OR I get the assholes using the kids tables to read wedding magazines or study. I used to kick them out and now I don't care as long as there's no kids in kids.
So I've made me some coffee and I've whipped out the Magnetic Fields and I'm trying to get myself mentally prepared for work. I mean, I'm not depressed or suicidal or anything. My life is fine, as fine as it can be. But closing shifts crush me.
You know what would cheer me up? Besides Natasha and Marisa in a bra and panties match?
If you were to go out right now and buy me the 7th Anniversary Halloween issue of Rue Morgue magazine with the article about me that my store won't have on sale until this tuesday, forcing me to wait with baited breath and eaten fingernails.
That would make me feel better. That and the wrestling match. Wish me luck at work.