Still, I think I'm going to get drunk tonight.
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Friday, November 11, 2005
Didn't get the promotion ...
... and I would be lying if I said that I wasn't relieved about it and yet at the same time I would also be lying if I said that I wasn't upset about it. I don't know how I feel. If I'm hurt at all, it's mostly because more than one manager at my store basically did everything else OTHER than straight up tell me I was going to get it. I stressed out big time over this, cried lots of tears and stayed up through many late nights over if I should go for this or not. But I was essentially goaded into agreeing to apply for the position simply because of an unspoken agreement between me and a few higher ups that basically told me that I would get it. I feel like I was used. Kinda. But I'm also relieved. I would have been great but miserable as a manager. But now I'm back to being in my happy, peaceful little cave, entertaining my kids, working for myself, being paid shit, and continuing to be the best fucking children's lead ever, the lead that does the work of a manager, the lead that does the work of two and a half lead, the lead that's basically a manager but without the pay.