NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest pbskids.org or barbie.com, you wuss!


SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE TO LISTEN TO MY HILARIOUS AND WILDLY OFFENSIVE PODCAST!

Monday, July 31, 2006

Things I've Learned About Black People From Watching The Maury Povich Show ...



- Black women have sex with ten to twenty people in one day.


- Black men are getting drunk and fucking overweight black women, then denying that they are the baby's daddy.


- Instead of purchasing a paternity test, black people would rather go on national television and embarrass themselves in order to get the paternity test free.




- When it is proven that you're not the father, you must dance. Dance like you're Will fucking Smith.


- It is possible to be 1,300% sure you aint the baby's daddy.


- Black women must scream their guts out that they be they babydaddy, even if you know in your heart that that's probably not true.


- If you ARE in fact the father, you must bow your head and try to look all bad ass and shit.




- Black men are "playaz" and the women they've just had sex with are "dirty grimey hoes."


- In the ghetto, you don't NEED no paternity test. I mean, just look at they nose, Maury! That be tha same damn nose! Look at they neck! LOOK AT THEY NECK!!!


- If the man that you're sure is the father ISN'T the father, black women will instinctively run to the nearest available greenroom.


- If the man that you're sure is the father turns out to actually BE the father, don't try to start building a sound bridge between the both of you, opening a road towards happy, safe parenting. No, fuck that. Get in their mother fucking face!




CLICK HERE FOR AN EXCLUSIVE MAURY POVICH AUDIO CLIP FROM ONE OF HIS RECENT PATERNITY TESTS!

1 comment:

Gregorio said...

i'm not sure which is more amazing... black people, maury povich, or america. and by amazing, i mean horribly morally reprehensible.