I've been stressed out, exhausted, angry and eternally upset. I've been feeling overworked and underappreciated and pretty much used. I've been stressed to the max and it's been spilling out into my personal life, making me blindly angry about everything in the world as a result. The black knuckles on my right hand are a prime example and so is the stomach disease that I know have to wrestle with daily
So yes, a massive amount of my problems can be traced to my work overworking me. And yes, a huge amount of my physical and mental problems of late can all be traced to my job forcing me to do the work of three or four other employees and cashiering and covering breaks and all that. Yes, my work is mainly responsible.
But I think I've found another reason ...
THIS is my coffee mug.
I call it The Kong.
For the last year or so, on any given workday I would on average drink one and a half of these during an eight hour shift. I would drink half, fill it up with warm coffee, and drink the rest. Sometimes I drank less and sometimes I drank close to two.
Two Kongs. Two whole fucking Kongs. In just eight hours. Can you believe that? And that's not including whatever coffee I'd drink before I went to work and whatever I'd drink when I got home. That's an almighty whopping shitload of coffee.
That's a lot.
That is a seriously dangerous amount of coffee for one person to drink. I know that. But that's what I felt I needed to get the amount of work done that my job was and still is giving me.
But for no real reason this past monday I just up and decided with no real forethought to just drink ONE CUP OF COFFEE in the morning and then NOT DRINK ANY MORE COFFEE ALL DAY.
My eight hour workday became what seemed to be a 72 hour workday but other than that the day was great. I was relaxed, less stressed, hardly angry, and I didn't burn out and lose it like I usually do. on tuesday I had storytime and on wednesday I had the Harry Potter club so I only drank a half a Kong, but I still has a somewhat okay day with minimal freakouts.
I think I can do this. I think I'm cutting down on the coffee. ME?!?!?!?! Can you believe that?
Things just might be getting better. Lord knows, to quote the Beatles, it can't get no worse.
As long as the world's still spinning and Scott's not a manager, then everything is going to eventually end up okay.