I get so worried. There's just so much that I don't know, so much she doesn't tell me because she doesn't want me to know.
I'm so tired. Why am I doing this to myself? Why?
I just erased two paragraphs from the end of this post. It started to sound angry and i'm not angry. I'm just tired and lonely and pathetic.
I need to go to bed now. I don't want to go to church tomorrow. I never do, really. here's to hoping I don't have to go.