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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

My Gay Stalker ...



I can't say I blame the guy. I mean, just look at that picture. I'm getting hotter in my old age. But, although I don't dig guys, if I did dig dunes I could get a whole lot better than the smelly drunk creepo who comes into my work and stares at me for hours on end.


At first he seemed like this hardcore angry black dude. He would come in to my department and listen to a beat up Walkman which would blare the loudest death metal you've ever heard. I mean, seriously, you could hear his music two or three departments away. That's how loud it was. And he would have magazines about weapons and fighting and books about angels and shit. But that would all be cover. What he really wanted to do was stare at people for hours on end, mainly me. This went on for about two weeks. he followed an employee to their car once. One time he yelled at a customer. It was starting to get frightening, especially the way he's just stare at people, especially me.


Then one day I was covering the front register. It was somewhere around 11:45am and he came up to be stinking of alcohol. He got in my face, introducing himself as Lucifer, and started telling me how my wedding ring is worth at least $1,500 and he knows that because his father is a real pirate and how good I looked and how I must work out and how handsome I was. It was frightening and intimidating and eventually security had to forcibly remove the guy from the store.


I thought that would be the end of it.


He came back twice after that and, again, sat in the kids section to stare at me. Some fellow employees suggested I call a manager to have him kicked out. But I was working in the teen section on those days, our teen department being removed from the place where he was sitting, so I didn't worry about it too much.


Yesterday I was getting ready for storytime. And there he was, waiting for me to start. That's when I put my foot down. I hid at the info desk while the manager removed him from the store. Then, get this, he actually CAME BACK a few hours later. Apparently he can't get enough of me. This time a different manager kicked him out. Now everyone I work with knows about my angry, possibly homeless, gay stalker. They think it's hilarious. Me, I don't find it funny. I watched my back the rest of the day and I even had one of the managers walk me to my car.


I'm deeply frightened about this.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm not gay!!!...And, come to think of it....I'm not black either.

- Bunny