NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest pbskids.org or barbie.com, you wuss!


SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE TO LISTEN TO MY HILARIOUS AND WILDLY OFFENSIVE PODCAST!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Some Random Thoughts And Free Christmas Music ...

-Sometimes this next picture reminds me of my life ...



-I am writing this during a very rainy day here in Seminole, the bleak boil on the butt of Oklahoma. There are days when I honestly don't know if I can stand living here. This place is so small and the people here seems so strange and primitive. I am used to big cities and now I'm stuck in some hick village in the middle of nowhere. But my wife says that she knows that I can do it and if she thinks that I can do it then I can. Or at least I think I can.


-Since Isabela and Maxwell were both born in September, that means that my wife and I got it ON in December. So my wife has put up a mandatory cock block this month, meaning NO sex for me. Not like I was getting any before that, but it just means that my brown balls are so blue that when I pee people mistake my testicular chicken tenders for Papa Smurf.




-So my youngest daughter and I are playing Marvel Super Hero Squad Online together. She WOULD play on her own but she gets confused and always needs help when it comes to video games, so I usually have to sweep in and help her, which becomes me playing a video game while she watches. But I really like this virtual superhero world. It's a really fun way for us to spend time together. And, quite frankly, I think that I may be having more geeky fun than she is playing this thing.


-Work is good. I have been working at my new store for about a week now. It's strange being there because I have over 11 years of bookselling experience, but the new store layout and the new customers makes me feel like a total noob. occasionally, though, someone will come up to me and ask me something and I will just KNOW exactly what they're looking for and exactly where it is. It's an exhilarating feeling to still have that "Mr. Steve" power that I was so worried that I lost. I'm still the man when it comes to working at a bookstore and I think it's only a matter of time until people REALLY start to notice.




-I was pleasantly surprised when I went to my new store and started meeting my fellow Okie employees. I expected something a lot more, well, racist I guess. I expected tall white men with army haircuts chewing Skoal Bandits and spitting and missing teeth and whatnot. I didn't expect a very nice Iranian guy and an older British woman to take me under their wing and help me learn the layout of the place. I also had a really sweet woman with pink hair and multiple facial piercings invite me to a Christmas party, so i guess you could say that I am finally starting to fit in. Yay for me!




-And, as promised in the title, here are some free Christmas music for your punk ass ...


Vince Guaraldi: Christmas Time Is Here (vocal version)

Death Cab For Cutie: Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)

The Format: Holly Jolly Christmas

south Park: Dead Dead Dead

Eels: Christmas Is Going To The Dogs

Blackalicious: Toy Jackpot

Mystery Science Theater 3,000: Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas

Jack johnson: Someday At Christmas

Blazer Force: Electronic Santa Claus

Run DMC: Christmas In Hollis

Weezer: O Come All Ye Faithful


You're welcome.


Winc Clan out.

No comments: