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Monday, October 29, 2012

Random Work Thoughts, Family Pictures, And Some Free Music ...

-Ok. Seriously. Let's talk about this. Really. Give it to me straight: Did Jenny give Forrest Gump AIDS? That's what she died of, right? I asked a few people and one person said she died of cancer. That doesn't make sense because she says they don't know what it is and they can't cure it. They knew what cancer was in the eighties. So I am pretty sure it was AIDS that she got from her slut drug partying phase. And she probably gave it to Forrest. So the sequel should be "Forrest Gump 2: Forrest VS. Aids!" Just sayin'.

-I think I would be more successful as a woman. I don't think that's something you would EVER hear a man say. It's just that I have a rather strange personality. I am strange and funny and I crack jokes and I have a hyper, manic energy. It gets me in trouble. Now, if I was a long haired brunette with big tits then my crazy personality would be a plus. It would be attractive. It would make me hot, quite frankly. Hell, I'd bang me.

-Now, don't get me wrong. My storytimes here in Oklahoma have been going on since May and they have become a HUUUUUUGE hit! I'm getting twenty to thirty-five kids every week now watching my crazy ass storytimes and during my review I was credited with "revitalizing the store's storytime program!" It's great. The big difference between Sacramento storytimes and my Oklahoma storytimes is that I started off as a normal storyteller but I slowly built UP to the craziness. Here I actually STARTED OFF CRAZY! I jumped right into the crazy characters and the trying to fall asleep during stories and the loud wild crazy business. And kids loved it! I didn't go slow and work my way up. I didn't slowly work my way into crazy. I was crazy from the get go. And the kids are going nuts over it. THANK GAWD! I was worried that these repressed Okies would be afraid of me but no. I started off quick, running headfirst into the madness and the damn kids are going crazy trying to catch up to me. I'm a success again. I was worried that these rednecks were gonna hate me. But they love me. And that's awesome.

-At the Sorghum Festival (and it deeeeeeeply depresses me that I just typed that) my kids got me an amazing bottle of homemade Oklahoma root beer. Homemade! I cannot wait to taste it. SOOOOOO, because of this we may be posting a SEVENTH episode of The Root Beer Show ...

-At my last storytime, a biiiiig Halloween storytime costume party, I had about 33 kids and almost all of them were in costume. One kid was wearing a very creative Angry Bird costume. It was an all red outfit with an Angry Bird face on his sweater and an Angry Bird hat. I told him, and I think it was hilarious, I said "Seriously, if somebody comes here dressed as a PIG, I am going to pick you up and throw you into them!" #WIN

-Here is my Halloween costume. I spent roughly $0.00 on it. It was a very Ed Wood style costume. Also, the word "tattoo" is tattooed on my back. It's cheap creativity. I think it's just stupid enough to be funny ...

Pink Floyd: Goodbye Blue Sky
Phantom Of The Opera: Overture
The Mike Flowers Pops: Wonderwall
Rolling Stones: In Another Land
Sponge: Go Speed Racer Go
They Might Be Giants: Twisting
Richard Cheese: Bust A Move

-Here is my newest coloring page. It's my first freehand no tracing coloring page for storytime and I think it turned out nicely. I don't mean to toot my own horn but BEEP BEEP ...

That's about it.

Think I might post another free movie later.

So stay tuned ...

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