NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest pbskids.org or barbie.com, you wuss!


SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE TO LISTEN TO MY HILARIOUS AND WILDLY OFFENSIVE PODCAST!

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Tired ...

I'm so tiiiiiiiiired!

I'm always tired now. It worries me how exhausted I am all the time. And yes, I know that I'm a paranoid, bipolar, crazy sort of guy, but I'm really worried that something is wrong with me. Or maybe I'm just getting old, too, because I am just wiped out constantly.

But, as a self-conscious Latino man, I try NOT to look tired. I try not to look how I feel because I know that the "lazy mexican" is an offensive stereotype and I don't want to just be another lazy "meex-e-cann," you know?

Like, watch this ...

See?

But I am tired as fuck and I don't know what to do.

Here's my new theme song ...

The Beatles: I'm So Tired

Probably going to bed now.

Wind Clan out.

A Small Note ...

Just a small note:

The comments are once again working and, although it seems like a pain in the butt, each and every post will be verified by me personally before they are published.

This blog was getting attacked by spammers recently. Such a pain.

No sunday movie today. I will try and post one tomorrow. I'm in the middle of a very hard six day work week.

More to come ...

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

My Wife ...

That is a picture of me and my wife. She is awesome as hell. My wife and I will have been married for seven years next month and we've been together for nine whole years. And that's some big time awesome right there.

Our anniversary is coming up soon, on Cinco De Mayo, coincidentally. And please don't think that my anniversary falling on that day has anything to do with my own hatred for my own Latino race. It's just the day we picked. I believe, in fact, that we strategically picked that day to claim it as our own in the same way that Christians and Catholics picked December 25th to trump that day's pagan holiday. This was our way to claim this lame-o mexi-holiday as our own.

I love my wife. I really do. She is my life. Natasha truly holds my heart in her hands until we both die and I am really happy with that. I couldn't be happier. I am comfortable. And the two of us have really been happy lately, having fun and getting into adventures and just being really good. Thank gawd, too, because we have been through some serious life and death SHIZnittle in those mine years. But I sincerely think that with all the pain and the fights that I can safely say that there is literally nothing she can do that will make me stop loving her and wanting to be with her.

I love my wife.

Good stuff.

I'm hoping that the two of us can go eat somewhere, maybe get some good Italian food somewhere, which is hard in Oklahoma, and then maybe get a drink or two and go see the new Avengers movie at our super small two screen movie theater here.

I have pictures from the Oklahoma City Zoo that I will try to post tomorrow.

Wind Clan out.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Steve's Church-less Movie Of The Week: Double Rifftrax Edition ...



Yoinked from the almighty wikipedia ...


"Reefer Madness (originally released as Tell Your Children and sometimes titled as The Burning Question, Dope Addict, Doped Youth and Love Madness) is a well-known 1936 American propaganda exploitation film revolving around the melodramatic events that ensue when high school students are lured by pushers to try 'marijuana' — from a hit and run accident, to manslaughter, suicide, attempted rape, and descent into madness. The film was directed by Louis Gasnier and starred a cast composed of mostly unknown bit actors.


Originally financed by a church group under the title Tell Your Children, the film was intended to be shown to parents as a morality tale attempting to teach them about the dangers of cannabis use. However, soon after the film was shot, it was purchased by producer Dwain Esper, who re-cut the film for distribution on the exploitation film circuit. The film was then reissued under several titles in addition to Reefer Madness, including Dope Addict, Doped Youth, Love Madness, and The Burning Question. The film did not gain an audience until it was rediscovered in the 1970s and gained new life as a piece of unintentional comedy among advocates of cannabis policy reform.




In 2004, 20th Century Fox, in collaboration with Legend Films, released a colorized version of the film on DVD. The original release date was April 20, 2004, a reference to the drug slang term 420. Also during the film, the number 4 and then 20 is flashed very quickly (as a joke on subliminal messages), which is an effect added by Legend Films. The color version features intentionally unrealistic color schemes that add to the film's unintentionally campy humor. The smoke from the 'marihuana"'was made to appear green, blue, orange, and purple, each person's colored smoke representing their mood and the different levels of addiction.


A DivX file of the colorized version with the commentary embedded is available as part of Michael Nelson's RiffTrax On Demand service. In 2009, a newly-recorded commentary by Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett, called the 'Three Riffer Edition', was released by RiffTrax, and was the feature of a Rifftrax 'live' event on August 19, 2010."


Steve's Snacks Of The Week:



Coffee

Pills

More Coffee

BBQ Chicken

Chips

Even More Coffee

Porn




... AND NOW, Reverend Steve and this blog are both PROUD to once again present today's Church-less Movie of the Week absolutely FREE! It's available to watch on Hulu in two different editions: a regular Rifftrax version and a live riffed Rifftrax version!


But first lets go over a few theater rules. Absolutely no talking is allowed. Any and all talkers will be sweat upon with extreme prejudice. No cell phones or African-American berries going off in the theater. And NO TEXTING!


And be sure to dim your headlights (where applicable).


ENJOY THE SHOW, Y'ALL!


Regular Rifftrax Edition

Live Riffed Edition

The Family Spends A Day At The Lake ...

Today we had perfect weather in Oklahoma. It was absolute picture perfect summer weather. In the spring.


So me n' muh kin folk went n' mosey'd on down to thuh swimmin' hole!


That's Okie for "The family and I went to the lake."


And to think, just a week ago we were riddled with golf ball sized hail and hideous tornado attacks and were worried of dying! The weather in Oklahoma is majorly bipolar, like Charlie Sheen sized bipolar.


Okie sky is bi-WINNING!


So anyway, here are some pics ...













Friday, April 20, 2012

The Pain In My Foot ...



I may have broken my right foot.


I don't know how I may or may not have done it but all that I know for certain is that suddenly yesterday afternoon as I arrived home from a hard day at work my right foot hurt a little bit like it was sore and I complained a bit about it. As the night grew on and on my foot hurt more and more.


Now,here it is, the next day, and I can barely put ANY pressure on my right foot without sharp searing white pain shooting throughout my body. I can move my toes outwards just fine, but trying to bunch them up or bend them down at all and I scream. It's a pain around the arch of my foot right below the ankle.


I don't know what it is or how it started hurting, either, which sucks. I don't even have an amusing story to go along with my pain like I hurt it skiing - or - I got this battle wound fighting albino Nazi ninja monks who were trying to tear down the rec center.


The pain hurt me so bad that I actually had to borrow one of my constantly debilitated mother-in-law's giant canes. So now I had to walk with a huge silver cane and a stupid gangsta pimp limp just like you always see minority hip hop gang bangers walking. Great. I should have keep my fucking papers with me today as I went out on the town.


Oh wait.


I didn't need my papers.


I'm not in racist ass Arizona!


(burn)


Public Enemy: By The Time I Get To Arizona


But the absolute WORST part about all this is that, since my mother-in-law is in constant pain because of a million things wrong with her and has needed but has been DENIED surgery for so LONG now, I really cannot complain at all about my agonizing foot. And that is because however bad I feel at all about anything, the rest of the family just comes right back at me with "Well, your mother in law feels WORSE!" which makes me seem like just a stupid little crybaby.


Which I AM, by the way.


But my foot really DOES hurt like a motherfucker.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Maxwell Crawling Some More ...

On my last day off we went and visited the small town library that was downtown. My wife got a card and bought a Harlequin romance novel from 1963! Crazy!


I sat in the small kids section, sat my child on the play mat on the bridge, and (quietly) tried to get him to crawl.


It takes a while for him to be brave enough to jump off the bridge into the water.


Here's some pictures and a video for you ...









Good stuff.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

My Brother's New Website ...



My brother Joe, or Jose if you want to get technical, has been diagnosed with a serious disease ...


I am sad to say ...


that he ...


is mentally "guitarded" now.


Visit his blog and see for yourself ...


Guitarded blog


If you don't go to his new website, you're a dirty communist bastard!


Wind Clan out.