NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest pbskids.org or barbie.com, you wuss!


SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE TO LISTEN TO MY HILARIOUS AND WILDLY OFFENSIVE PODCAST!

Friday, July 26, 2013

On Being Broke ...

I am poor.

There is no denying it. I am poor.

I mean, when you're too broke to afford gas to get to your job, then you KNOW you're poor. And that's me. I am poor.

See, I had to get out of California. There were people there who held me down and saw me as this hideous bad guy, as this horrible person, when all I was doing was helping people and entertaining kids. My heart was broken and I broke a heart or two. It's bad stuff all around. I was like Wreck-It Ralph. I was the scapegoat. I was the bad guy of Arden Fair. I couldn't do anything right. I mean, I was robbed at gunpoint and my brave thinking saved lives and all I got was a hefty therapy bill and a demand to work harder.

Plus my wife and I could barely make ends meet where we were. And to make matters worse, we just had our third child but no relatives around us to share it with. See, people who move to Cali never STAY there. Never. All my family had moved back to Phoenix and all of my wife's family had inexplicably moved to Nowhere, Oklahoma because apparently God told them to. I wasn't happy about the idea of moving to white bread Okie-ville, but I knew I just had to get the hell out of California.

About 20 months later I find myself living in Oklahoma. It just sort of happened. Suddenly I'm here. I miss a few people in California. And I desperately miss my parents. And I miss having friends, money, places to go. I miss a lot.

I like my job fine. I do. But I'm underemployed and I'm struggling to make ends meet. I went from a lead, a manager, to a part time scrub. Now I need a second job. Hell, I need a second thru fourth job. Because being a snarky bastard who posts free movies and boobs on a blog isn't making me any money.

Any ideas?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Write. Do standup. Sit down when you pee. You are a funny motherfucker.