Ever since I've moved from my lifetime state of Arizona into this cell phone hell hole, I've been pretty goddamm miserable. Drinking non-stop. Going to my stupid little karaoke bar with the same little crew. Singing the same small songs. Smoking up a storm. Trying to forget the friends I left and the chances I threw away. The fiance I hurt. The fiance that left me.
Funny, though. I think I might be in love. I think.
Don't be happy, though. There's more to this than just being in love. This is the beginning of a really bad time. There's probably going to be some violence. I might even have to defend myself. A lot of bad things are going to be said. A lot of drama, crying, agony, pain, suffering, name calling, back stabbing. Bad stuff like that.
Like in that movie The Godfather when the five families are going to war, right, they go to "the mattresses" they say, like, to hide out the war. Yeah, I'm about to hit the mattresses.
Will it be worth it?
Goddamm, I hope so.