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Friday, October 14, 2005

"King Kong" video diary released on DVD !BEFORE! movie released in theaters ...

... God, does anybody else's head hurt when they hear this news? Or am I the only one? I hate technology. I hate DVD's and the internet and hip internet people's strange need to now use the internet to know EVERY LITTLE MINUTE FUCKING DETAIL about a film that won't come out until like a year and a half later. That's strange and sad to me. It's even more sad seeing as how Hollywood's newest crucified messiah Peter Jackson is behind it all.

Now, Kevin Smith's little internet video diary for "Clerks 2," THAT's the way it should be done ... funny, lighthearted, smart, self-depricating, and altogether cool as hell. But Peter "I went from 395 lbs. to only 50 lbs. on the Movie Crack Addict diet" Jackson has to suck himself off yet again. So now the DVD of the making of the film is coming out on DVD a day BEFORE the movie comes out in theaters.

Doesn't that break some fucking law of physics or something? Here's the press release about it ...

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Universal is taking a novel approach to marketing its upcoming, big-budget film "King Kong" by releasing a DVD documenting the making of the movie a day before the film hits theaters.

The DVD "KING KONG: Peter Jackson's Production Diaries" marks the first time a major studio will ship retailers a DVD featuring a behind-the-scenes look at a film ahead of its theatrical release, a Universal Studios Home Entertainment spokeswoman said on Thursday, and industry sources agreed.

By releasing the two-DVD set along with a companion book on December 13, the package helps promote the "Kong" movie that hits theaters on December 14. In turn, the movie helps drive DVD sales among fans who want to learn more after they see the film.

My head hurts. God I hate movies. The last movie I saw in the theaters was "The Aristocrats." Before that I saw the last Star Wars movie and before that I saw Hitchhiker's. I basically avoided each and every big budget blockbuster cock sucking summer movie. That's what summer movies are, a blowjob. A big budget three hundred million dollar watered down nonthreatening easily accessable for everyone fucking blowjob.

And if there's something that I hate more than that, it's some big assed pretentious art film that all the hipsters love and the critics cream over that has nothing to say to me. I hate that. I hate film. I just want to stay home, watch my old VHS movies of Ed Wood, Terry Gilliam, and various B-movies, and escape the trappings of the dead horse known as modern day hollywood.

God I hate movies.

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