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Thursday, August 24, 2006

Selections from My Feature Film ...

(taken on the set of Smoke and Mirrors)

Back when I still lived in Phoenix my director friend Mr. Michael (alias Michael Alessandro) wrote an incredibly ambitious script involving gambling, sex, violence, betrayal, nudity, Las Vegas, homosexuality, murder and, above all, magic. He got some money together, held auditions, gathered a massive cast and said lets shoot this fucker.

He didn't LITERALLY says that. I was just looking for a way to try and sell one of my shirts that no one ever buys. Sorry. Continuing now ...

The result was "Smoke and Mirrors," a massively ambitious magician's crime noir film with a sweeping multilayered plot that featured me as a wimpy, luckless car thief and my then girlfriend Debby as a scheming big breasted young sexpot.

Mr. Michael tried to shop his film around but after finding no takers he decided to cut the film up, splice it with some impressive albeit laptop-style effects, and turned his film into "Smoke and Mirrors: The Magicians," a web serial that succeeded to premiere seven parts, each one five to eleven minutes each, before stress and personal matters (AKA a new baby) temporarily sidelined the epic project.

I know I should have asked first but I have taken the liberty of uploading the prologue and parts one and two of the film on YouTube in the hopes that it will garner discussion about the picture and hopefully become a source of inspiration to Mr. Michael himself, inspiring him to take a break or two from playing with his new son Daschle (yes, that's his kid's REAL name ... but since my youngest daughter was named after an actor from Plan 9, I can't really talk) to crank out a few more chapters.

And I don't say that simply because I'm IN the film. I say that because I'm a fan. This shit is good and I can't wait to know what happens next.

Here's the prologue and parts one and two. Let me know what you think ...


(part one, which I first appear in)

(part two)

The cast of Smoke and Mirrors

Parts three thru seven can be seen right here on the figuratively dust-covered web site which hasn't been updated in well over a year. Here's some fairly neato stuff for you to look for when you're viewing the remaining chapters ...

-Chapter three features more of me and your first glimpse of my ex-girlfriend's big naked titties

-I was a shadow in the bathroom of Jack Dawkins' hotel room in chapters three and four

-The beginning of chapter six has a sign which says "LIQUOR MOCCASINS" which I like to think are shoes for Indians made out of alcohol

-I can NOT be seen getting totally shitfaced blitzed drinking a literal beer called "Arrogant Bastard Ale" in the bar in chapter seven

-Check out Mr. Michael's big fat manchops in chapter seven. GOT-DAMN dude's got some serious chops (!!!!!)

-Parts of chapters six and seven have scenes filmed in Alcatraz penitentiary.

Again, please post a comment and let me know what you think. I'll pass along your comments to the director who just recently moved to Nebraska.

Thanks for your time.

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