... tomorrow is Emerald's first day at school. Her first day at school. She's going to learn and read and write and make friends and get hurt and grow up and I'm not going to be there.
This is the worst feeling I've ever had in my entire life.
She went to bed around eight. She looked so excited. She had this gleam in her eye. She's honestly enthusiastic about tomorrow. I'm trying to be manly about this, you know? I tucked her in, got her some water, and read the book "It's Hard to Be Five" by Jamie Lee Curtis to her. It was tough not to cry but I did my best.
This is the worst feeling I've ever had in my entire life. It stings like two breakups, like when I'd get an F in a class, like I didn't get the part I wanted in the play, like I just got pulled over and I had a few beers. It's ALL OF THAT rolled into one. My baby's going to school. She used to sleep in a crib and now she's leaving me to go to school. I can feel my heart breaking into a million pieces.
Plus I just learned that the shitfaced dogs next door tore the hell out of my one of a kind EdWood.org hat.
I hurt so bad.
I don't know how the hell I'm going to do this tomorrow without feeling like I'm dying inside.
Wish me luck tomorrow.