NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest or, you wuss!


Thursday, February 22, 2007

Ed Wood's Disneyland Forever CD ...

... for a small time at the end of 1998 to the beginning of 1999, Disneyland had these touchscreen kiosks where for just twenty bucks you could choose up to ten tracks from a massive list of park songs, parades, sound bytes, ride soundtracks and a whole bunch of other crazy stuff and THEN have it burned on to your very own personalized cd. Your own personalized Disneyland soundtrack. They were called "Disneyland Forever" cds and they were awesome and cheap and strange and funny and altogether cool. You could pretty much load up your own personal cd with anything from the entire massive Disneyland library. You could have the entire Pirates of the Caribbean ride on four thick tracks. You could fill your whole cd with JUST Haunted Mansion stuff. There was even a track from Club 33, the private resturant hidden in New Orleans Square.

It was amazing. Even now, almost ten years later, I still think that its the most incredible thing ever and I still mourn the fact that they stopped making them. I wish I would have made a million cds while I had the chance. But I only made one.

It was in December of 1998. I was living in Arizona and I was on vacation with Sarah Snow and her family. We were spending time in San Francisco and then driving down the coast to Los Angeles. The first night I realized that Sarah's mom, the late great Mary Snow, snored with the volume and force of five massive fighter jets. I think the walls shook, she was such a massive snorer. And I lived under the same room as my dad and my brother and they snored super huge. I barely slept that entire week. And I used that to guilt them into taking a sidetrip to Disneyland for a day.

And it was then that I made my cd.

I didn't think they'd let me put my name as Jesus Christ on th cover but they let me. And I put my name as Edward D. Wood Jr. so the actual cd says "Jesus Christ's Disneyland Forever. Produced at Disneyland USA by Edward D. Wood Jr." and that's totally sweet. I had originally wanted to make a mixup cd featuring ONLY Pirates and the Mansion but on second thought I decided to fill it with cool strange little things. In retrospect it was a bad idea in that I wish I had more Pirates and Mansion stuff on my iPod but on the bright side the cool small little things I put on my cd are in constant rotation on my iPod and everybody at work likes it when they play on days I force my iPod onto people.

Here is 80% of my Disneyland Forever cd. Track ten was scratched and I couldn't rip track eight which is the entire Submarine ride. Hope you like them. Most of this stuff is pretty rare. Download it before a cease and desist comes my way ...

Main Street Early Morning Announcement - hearing this totally takes me back to the cobblestone streets and the ragtime music and the hideous LA weather.

Two Brothers - this is a depressing song from the old school introduction to Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln. I always loved this song and I geeked out when I finally had it. A cannonball don't pay no mind. Sweet line. I've heard there's a new intro for the ride that doesn't have this song and that's really lame. This was totally Tom and I's song. BTW, Tom and I used to be bestest friends and we'd take random road trips to Disneyland a lot. So you'll hear his name dropped a lot on this list. Just a warning

Tiki Room Garden Speeches - I am a huge geek for the Tiki Room. I don't know why. For most people the singing bird room is old and outdates and strange but I dig the hell out of it. My favorite part, however, is BEFORE the ride when the god statues in the waiting area come to life. THIS track is the gods coming to life. It's cool.

Tiki War Chant - this is the next to last song in the Enchanted Tiki Room. It's mellow and fast, quiet and angry, and it ends with rain. If you were to take this song out of Disneyland and remove the racist stereotype birds in the beginning, this would STILL be an amazing song that I would love to listen to.

1985 Monorail Narration - in it, they mention their "100 Acre parking area" and I remember me and Tom walking through the huge ass parking lot to the main entrance. I miss the parking lot. I miss the excitement of riding on their crappy little tram thru the parking lot to the main gate. I miss seeing a sea of cars. Am I the only one?

Fantasyland Safety Spiels - this is a montage of all the safety tracks they play before and after the rides in Fantasyland. I got this because waiting in line for the Matterhorn bobsleds, you hear "Remain seated please, permane ser centavos por favor" like three MILLION times! It got to be Tom and I would say that all the time, constantly. Permane ser centavos por favor! So when I saw I had a chance to get THAT on a cd, I had to take that chance. Strange but cool.

The Monorail Song - this was a mixup. I thought it said "The Peoplemover Song." I loved the Peoplemover, those slow ass buckets crawling through Tomorrowland. They were cool and plastic and shakey and they moved at like two miles and hour. They were like the Ed Wood of Disneyland. PLUS they moved through Star Tours and there was a killer TRON part that seriously tripped your balls. Sucks they're gone. Still, this is a peppy little song.

Matterhorn Climbers Announcement - this is the cheesy ass "Hans and Otto" speech they play when people try to climb the Matterhorn. Short but still sweet.

And also, as a special added bonus for all y'all Disneyland nerds out there, here's a few extra little tracks from the 50th Anniversary Disneyland double disc cd that I "liberated" from the park during our kick ass Galindo family visit back in 2005 ...

Main Street: All Aboard

King Arthur's Carousel: Once Upon a Dream

Dick Dale: Space Mountain

Hope you like all the Disneyland music. Peace out, bitches!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Rev Steve, what's your email address? I can send you mp3s from a Haunted Mansion CD and a Pirates CD.

The Haunted Mansion CD is called "Haunted Mansion 30th Anniversary" and contains a ride thru and some special features, for lack of a better word.

The Pirates CD is called "Disney's Pirates Of The Caribbean Theme Park Exclusive" and contains the entire ride soundtrack as well as isolated tracks. There are also some tracks from the original recording sessions.