NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest or, you wuss!


Wednesday, April 4, 2007

(insert witty hipster headline here)

... this past monday I woke up early, worked out, drank a few cups of coffee, and I came to work feeling happy and positive and upbeat with a spring in my steap, all ready to kick me some serious ass. It looked like it was going to be a good day at work.

So right off the bat I should have known that something was wrong.

Well, turns out the closer in kids the night before (on a spring break weekend) called in sick and they didn't get anyone to close in there. There were massive piles on my desk plus no recovery of the section and a HUGE full black hand cart filled with books to be put away. And three carts of frontlist from the weekend. It took me from 9am to 2pm to get it all put away and that's not including the books that needed to be put away from THAT DAY as well as the new books that had just arrived.

Plus I covered the customer service desk's breaks (because Scott was apparently too busy being "Look at me, I'm Scott, watch me pretend to be a manager" to cover any breaks) and I even got stuck behind a register for about 20 or so minutes.

Take a good look at those crying eyes. This is me overworked.

In like two or three weeks we have our inventory and I'm not ready. I'm in no way ready. My section isn't ready. I'm overworked and my "employees" (he says with a laugh) are never allowed to stay in my section and do their job that they're supposed to be doing. Hell, even I'm not allowed to do my job. I'm trying not to lose it, not to sweat it, not to repeatedly slam my fist into the nearest available wall until it's a bloody stump.

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinkin'.

And that ain't just a quote from Airplane, either. I'm serious here. I'm angry and snippy. I'm grumpy and pissed off. I have anger issues. I'm depressed. I'm deeply depressed. Plus I'm having sleeping promlems. WHEN I get sleep it's not enough. I'm exhausted all the time. I'm always tired. And my body is all over screaming in massive amounts of pain.

And I'm pretty sure I've got manic depression.

(dramatic pause)

All the sex my wife and I have been having re-e-e-e-eally helps take the edge off, tho.

Hell yeah.

As long as I'm getting some (ahem, getting a LOT!) then the world is an alright place. All is well with the world right now. The rightful order has been restored. As for me and my house, we will serve the lord of gettin' some. Everything is cool mellow vibes for me and my crotch because I be getting some.

To celebrate my massive sex-filled day off, here's some music for you and your punk ass, courtesy of the evil and sinister Dr. Borderz ...

Home Movies: Don't Put Marbles in Your Nose

Modest Mouse: Missed the Boat

Gnarls Barkley: Basically (U.K. alternate version of "Who Cares")

Rolling Stones: Citadel

Timbaland featuring The Hives: Throw it On Me

Ash: Burn Baby Burn

Chibo Matto: Birthday Cake

DJ Kootchie: Hate It Ain't So

Porno for Pyros: Pets

The Get Up Kids: Second Place

Partyben: Galvanize the Empire

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Quit. Get a real job that actually pays a living wage and treats you like a human.