NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest or, you wuss!


Thursday, May 31, 2007

Various Random Whatnots ...

... I have two days off in a row starting today, thanks to the holiday last monday, which I worked. Time and a half for me. That should look good on my paycheck. And thank god I got time and a half because my work was packed all to hell that day. The new pirates movie is playing right outside my work's doors, so all weekend we were packed with those clueless sort of people who never go to a bookstore until they have 45 minutes to kill.

Not that I'm bitter or anything.

I'm not really sure what I'm going to do with my time. I feel like I should do something with my time, you know? I might make a super vhs tape of ESPN's now cancelled "Cheap Seats" but without all the annoying sports commercials. Then there was some talk just a while ago about going over to Gwen's tomorrow and helping her clean. Not my idea of a fun day but at least it'll get us out of the house for a while. Marisa was going to call me if she needed a ride to her physical therapy appointment today. I haven't heard from her yet which probably means she has a ride. That sucks. I was looking forward to maybe spending some time with her beyond taking her to work.

I don't want to say that my wife and I are having troubles.

Because we're not. We're fine together.

It's just that, I don't know how to explain it. There's this wall between us. I don't know where it came from or how long its been there. But its there, this big wall that's separating us. We're not the same with each other anymore. There's something between us. We're both not at our best. Natasha's still suffering from extreme bouts of postpartum depression from Isabela being born and I'm on anidepression pills and I'm exhausted all the time from busting my ass at work and then my body is in constant pain because I'm suffering from what feel like a million different ailments.

And I'm losing weight. I was 153 pounds three weeks ago when I went to the doctor's. A week before that I was 159. Now I'm 143 lbs. That's over 15 pounds in a month. That's bad.

I don't think we're growing apart. I hope not. It's just there's something missing and I don't know what it is. At times there's just so much silence between us that it frightens me. We're a million miles away in the same room sometimes and I don't know what to do.

Anyway, here's some music for your punk ass ...

Timbaland featuring The Hives: Throw It On Me

James Brown: Super Bad

Warrant: Heaven

Sifl & Olly: Fake Blood

Frank Sinatra: Fly Me To The Moon

Amazing Transparent Man: Criminal

Rolling Stones: Citadel

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

It's not to help me clean. The house is fine, but my lawn looks like ass and your wife was kind enough to offer awhile back to help me deal with it.

It's fine, Steve, if you don't feel like it. I don't even feel like it.

I'm sorry you and Natasha are having problems of sorts. Why don't we cancel tomorrow and the two of you spend that time together, doing something that makes both of you happy. =)