NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest or, you wuss!


Thursday, August 2, 2007

My Doctor's Note ...

... I went to see my doctor today.

He gave me some pills to take in case I have another massive migraine like the one I had yesterday and he gave me a new nasal spray that should stop all the nosebleeds. He also gave me a free refill of my anti-anxiety medicine, although I've only been taking half doses of it ever since I started taking those all natural iodine pills that my dad hit me up about. My doctor, evidently not knowing me too well, said that I also should quit caffeine completely. Yeah. That won't be happening. I also had him check out my neck as well because it was hurting so much a while back that I thought that I had broken it. Seriously, we almost went to the emergency room, it was hurting so bad.

Basically Dr. Kim said that almost ALL of the problems that I've been having recently (neck pain, severe stomach cramps, throat and ear infections, dizzyness, a wicked eating disorder, depression, arm pain, eye pain, leg pain, headaches, nosebleeds, migraines, and a few other things I won't bother to mention) are all a direct result of my job. It all comes from me pushing myself, me doing too much work, me doing the work of three booksellers in one eight hour shift, me working way too hard, me lifting too much at work and me running around and busting my ass and stressing out to the point that my body is literally trying to break down.

My doctor said that my job (and my subconscious need to work ten times harder than what's necessary which probably comes from my father) is solely to blame for all my physical ailments and that I need to take it easy.

He ordered me to take it easy.

So he wrote me a note. An actual doctor's note. He wrote up a return to work form to bring to work tomorrow as proof that I work too hard and I need to take it easy. It says that I can't lift more than 25 lbs. and I can't lift for more than an hour and "In general patient needs to not rush around as may aggravate his medical problem."

That's so fucking awesome. That's hardcore.

I told him that he should add something about me needing a raise (having the kids yell that at work is kinda my bit) but he didn't go for it.

Here's some free music for your punk ass, courtesy of bookseller superhero Captain Book ...

PJ Harvey: Down By The Water

Beach Boys: In My Room

Frank Sinatra: Fly Me To The Moon

Mungo Jerry: In The Summertime

Jay-Z: Dirt Off Your Shoulder

Reverend Steve Galindo (featuring Aryan Embarrassment): My Brother's Sock (Sock Rockin' Beat Mix)

Blink 182: All The Small Things

Eels: Somebody Loves You

Crowded House: Don't Dream It's Over

Kansas: Dust In The Wind

The Zombies: Time Of The Season

Reverend Steve Galindo: Angora on the Shelf

This video is how I feel ...

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