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Friday, April 20, 2012

The Pain In My Foot ...

I may have broken my right foot.

I don't know how I may or may not have done it but all that I know for certain is that suddenly yesterday afternoon as I arrived home from a hard day at work my right foot hurt a little bit like it was sore and I complained a bit about it. As the night grew on and on my foot hurt more and more.

Now,here it is, the next day, and I can barely put ANY pressure on my right foot without sharp searing white pain shooting throughout my body. I can move my toes outwards just fine, but trying to bunch them up or bend them down at all and I scream. It's a pain around the arch of my foot right below the ankle.

I don't know what it is or how it started hurting, either, which sucks. I don't even have an amusing story to go along with my pain like I hurt it skiing - or - I got this battle wound fighting albino Nazi ninja monks who were trying to tear down the rec center.

The pain hurt me so bad that I actually had to borrow one of my constantly debilitated mother-in-law's giant canes. So now I had to walk with a huge silver cane and a stupid gangsta pimp limp just like you always see minority hip hop gang bangers walking. Great. I should have keep my fucking papers with me today as I went out on the town.

Oh wait.

I didn't need my papers.

I'm not in racist ass Arizona!


Public Enemy: By The Time I Get To Arizona

But the absolute WORST part about all this is that, since my mother-in-law is in constant pain because of a million things wrong with her and has needed but has been DENIED surgery for so LONG now, I really cannot complain at all about my agonizing foot. And that is because however bad I feel at all about anything, the rest of the family just comes right back at me with "Well, your mother in law feels WORSE!" which makes me seem like just a stupid little crybaby.

Which I AM, by the way.

But my foot really DOES hurt like a motherfucker.

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