NOTE: If you are easily offended by offensive things then please go somewhere else. I suggest or, you wuss!


Monday, November 11, 2013

A Life Without Television ...

I have gone a whole year without tv.

How did I do this, you ask?

Simple, really. I have a very old television set. The buttons have been close to falling off for about five years now. No HD for me. And that also means no television stations. None.

I miss Saturday Night Live.

Sure I bought a box, one of those satellite boxes that allows old, ancient tv's to get stations. And it worked. In California, which is where I bought the thing. But, and believe me I have wasted hours upon hours trying, the box appears to be absolutely worthless in Oklahoma.

I miss tv.

I miss having PBS cartoons available to help me raise a young one. I mean, shit, my two year old son has NEVER watched Sesame Street! Never!

I miss Saturday Night Live. I missed the last half of last season and so far ALL of the present one. I never said good bye to Stefan.

I miss all the shit,  all the stupid pointless shit. Maury and his paternity shows. Stupid local news where they pretend to be friends. Mexican telenovelas that I can't understand but are so cheesy that the language battier doesn't matter.

I never got to see Under The Dome.


The rest of my family family doesn't seem to miss tv as much as I do. My wife never cared for tv. The last show she liked was damn Gilmore Girls. My youngest daughter is all about her Nintendo DS and my oldest can read a full length novel in a day and a half.

But I'm different. See, my dad was never around growing up and the kids in my all white neighborhood in Arizona werent allowed to play with the Mexican kid, so I was an incredibly lonely boy. I was pretty much raised by my mother and cable tv. Most days it seemed that comic books and tv were my only friend.

I miss tv and I want it back.

Maybe it would be different if we had wifi.

The way we survive without tv is with my own massive collection of bad movies, my wife's nice Disney collection, dvd rentals mainly from the library, and random bootlegs. Today, for instance, my son and I watched Looney Tunes from the Norman library and are now watching Pacific Rim from a free rental coupon I got from Family Video. Maybe later we'll watch Godzilla VS Mothra or Wall-E. We'll see.

But I reeeeeeeaaaaaaaally miss tv!

Thankfully my wife and I are finally getting our feet stabilized underneath us, money wise. We are slowly but surely paying all the bills that need to be paying and getting caught up with our lives. We're looking good.

What i'm trrrrrying to say is that our unfortunate tv exile may soon be over.

Unfortunately, the phrase "soon" refers to three to twelve months from now. It's going to be a while until we are stable enough to afford something frivolous like a tv. My parents said that they would get us one for Christmas but they have enough problem on their hands  that I don't expect them to see that thru.

I just wanted to explain why I miss tv.

That is all.

No comments: